funny movie quotes, A collection of funny movie quotes,best 38 picture quotes from all funny movies


1.

It happened. It happened.

Ohh. You're really doing it, aren't you? You're really shitting in the street.

From movie: bridesmaids (2011),lmao,this part.

funny movie quotes


2.
[after robbing two men of their clothes] Thank you, gentlemen! Someday, I will repay you. Unless, of course, I can't find you or if I forget.

Shrek 2 is a 2004 animated film sequel to the previous film Shrek in which Princess Fiona's parents invite her and Shrek to dinner to celebrate her marriage, not knowing that the newlyweds are both ogres.

2 01 Unless, of course, I can't find you or if I forget


3.

911? my friend is bleeding out of her vagina.

MOVIE 43 (2013)

Jimmy Bennett: She's having her period!
Chloe Grace Moretz: What do I do?!
Christopher Mintz-Plasse: Well, we're just gonna have to plug it up!
Jimmy Bennett: 911! My friend is bleeding out of her vagina!
Christopher Mintz-Plasse: I've got frozen pees and a sponge!

3 911,my friend is bleeding out of her vagina.


4.

Yo! Does this shirt make me look gay?
How about now?


scary movie 3

funny movie quotes


5.
Where'd you learn to drive like that?

Grand Theft Auto.

The Other Guys (2010)

funny movie quotes
6.
How old are you, McLovin? Old enough.

Superbad is a 2007 American comedy film directed by Greg Mottola and starring Jonah Hill and Michael Cera.


Officer Michaels: How old are you McLovin?
Fogell: Old enough.
Officer Michaels: Old enough for what?
Fogell: To party.

funny movie quotes


7.

Plus, I haven't gotten my period in two months…which is really weird because I've mostly just been doing anal.

Funny scenes from We’re The Millers.

7 We’re The Millers.

8.

I like your shirt
I hate boys


 "I Hate Boys" for the film It's Kind of a Funny Story (2010)


wear this girl ( emma roberts) is wearing a shirt that says "I HATE BOYS" and a boy says i like your shirt.

funny movie quotes


9.
Fuck,seriously… it's like you're photoshopped.

Crazy, Stupid, Love. (2011)Quotes

Hannah: Will you take off your shirt… fuck! Seriously? It's like you're Photoshopped!

funny movie quotes
10.

I'm sorry, I took your daughter's virginity. It won't happen again.

It is from a show called "Awkward". Season 3 Episode 4

funny movie quotes
11.
…because waitting for you is like waiting for rain in this drought. Useless and disapointing.

A Cinderella Story (2004)Quotes

Austin: Sam! Okay, I know you think that I'm just some…
Sam: Coward? Phony?
Austin: Okay, just listen.
Sam: No, you listen. You turned out to be exactly who I thought you were. I never pretended to be somebody else. It's been me all along. And it was me who was hurt in front of everybody. Look, I didn't come here to yell at you, okay? I came to tell you that I know what it feels like to be afraid to show who you are. I was, but I'm not anymore. And the thing is, I really don't care what people think about me… because I believe in myself. And I know that things are gonna be okay. But even though I have no family, and no job, and no money for college… it's you that I feel sorry for.

David: Heads up! Yo, five minutes.
Austin: I'm coming!
Sam: I know that guy that sent those emails is somewhere inside of you, but I can't wait for him… because waiting for you is like waiting for rain in this drought. Useless and disappointing.

[walks away]
Austin: SAM!
[punches locker]

11 because waiting for you is like waiting for
12.

-I don't need dental work.
-You're right.

-There is nothing wrong with my teeth.
-You are so beautiful. 


Bridesmaids quotes

funny movie quotes

13.
Are you always this cocky? Only on Tuesdays.


the three musketeers quotes 2011


D'Artagnan: Enjoying the show?
Constance: Are you always this cocky?
D'Artagnan: Only on Tuesdays… and whenever beautiful women are involved.
Constance: So, you think I'm beautiful?
D'Artagnan: Actually, it's Tuesday.

13 Are you always this cocky  Only on Tuesdays.


14.
I like your dress.
It's because I've got these incredible boobs to fill it out.

13 Going on 30 quotes 

14 I like your dress
15.

Wednesday's at that very special age when a girl has only one thing on her mind.

Boys?
Homicide.

the addams family quotes  1991

15 Homicide

16.

Love her dress, Hate her.

a cinderella story

16 Love her dress, Hate her.
17.

Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die.


mean girls quotes

17 Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die.
18.

They don't know that we know,they know we know.

Friends quotes  Episode 5.14

Phoebe: They thought they could mess with us! They're trying to mess with us? They don't know that we know they know we know! And Joey, you can't say anything!

Joey: I couldn't if I wanted too.

18 They don't know that we know,they know we know.

19.
I am not watching The Notebook again.

Can somebody help me find The Notebook?

Teen Wolf (2011 TV series)

19 Can somebody help me find The Notebook
20.
People thought I was a dirty skank?
Fine, I'd be the dirtiest skank they'd ever seen.

easy a quotes

20 People thought I was a dirty skank

21.

You are literally too stupid to insult.
Thank you.

The Hangover (2009)Quotes

Alan Garner: Guys. Guys. What about the tiger? What if he got out?
Phil Wenneck: Oh, fuck! I keep forgetting about the goddamn tiger! How the fuck did he get in there?
Stu Price: I don't know, because I don't remember.
Phil Wenneck: Shh! Stu. Stu, keep it down.
Alan Garner: One of the side effects of roofies is memory loss.
Stu Price: You are literally too stupid to insult.

21 You are literally too stupid to insult

22.

I was so upset when my grandpa died.

The Hangover (2009)Quotes

Alan Garner: What if Doug's dead? I can't afford to lose somebody close to me again, it hurts too much. I was so upset when my grandpa died.
Phil Wenneck: How'd he die?
Alan Garner: World War II.
Phil Wenneck: Died in battle?
Alan Garner: No, he was skiing in Vermont, it was just during World War II.

22 I was so upset when my ...
23.

It appears we've run into a rough patch of weather…

“I have an announcement, too: there is a colonial woman on the wing. I saw her. There is something they’re not telling us!” —Annie, warning her fellow 

passengers of the old-timey, butter-churning menace she spots on the wing of the plane in Bridesmaids.

Bridesmaids quotes 2011

23 I have an announcement...There is a colonial

24.

This is the quote I rmemebr best from the movie!!! It was so funny!!

Steve Rogers: Thor, what's his play?
Thor: He has an army, called the Chitauri. They're not of Asgard or any world known. He means to lead them against your people. They will win him the Earth. 

In return, I suspect, for the Tesseract.
Steve Rogers: An army. From outer space.
Bruce Banner: So he's building another portal. That's what he needs Erik Selvig for.
Thor: Selvig?
Bruce Banner: He's an astrophysicist.
Thor: He's a friend.
Natasha Romanoff: Loki has them under some kind of spell. Along with one of ours.
Steve Rogers: I wanna know why Loki let us take him. He's not leading an army from here.
Bruce Banner: I don't think we should be focusing on Loki. That guy's brain is a bag full of cats. You can smell crazy on him.
Thor: Have a care how you speak! Loki is beyond reason, but he is of Asgard and he is my brother!
Natasha Romanoff: He killed eighty people in two days.
Thor: He's adopted.


The Avengers : Quotes

24 The Avengers Quotes


25.

I mean look at you two! I mean it's like Barbie…and Grandpa Ken.


Just Go with It  2011

25 I mean it's like Barbie...and Grandpa Ken

26.

What am I allergic to?
Pine nuts. And the full spectrum of human emotion.

The Proposal (I) (2009)Quotes


Margaret Tate: What am I allergic to?
Andrew Paxton: Pine nuts, and the full spectrum of human emotion.

26 Pine nuts. And the full spectrum of human emotion

27.
Terry Hoitz: No, I don't like you. I think you're a fake cop. The sound of your piss hitting the urinal, it sounds feminine. If you were in the wild, I would attack you, even if you weren't in my food chain. I would go out of my way to attack you. If I were a lion and you were a tuna, I would swim out in the middle of the ocean and freaking eat you and then I'd bang your tuna girlfriend.

Allen Gamble: OK, first off: a lion, swimming in the ocean. Lions don't like water. If you placed it near a river or some sort of fresh water source, that make sense. But you find yourself in the ocean, 20 foot wave, I'm assuming off the coast of South Africa, coming up against a full grown 800 pound tuna with his 20 or 30 friends, you lose that battle, you lose that battle 9 times out of 10. And guess what, you've wandered into our school of tuna and we now have a taste of lion. We've talked to ourselves. We've communicated and said 'You know what, lion tastes good, let's go get some more lion'. We've developed a system to establish a beach-head and aggressively hunt you and your family and we will corner your pride, your children, your offspring.

Terry Hoitz: How you gonna do that?
Allen Gamble: We will construct a series of breathing apparatus with kelp. We will be able to trap certain amounts of oxygen. It's not gonna be days at a time. An hour? Hour forty-five? No problem. That will give us enough time to figure out where you live, go back to the sea, get some more oxygen, and stalk you. You just lost at your own game. You're outgunned and out-manned.

[pause]
Allen Gamble: Did that go the way you thought it was gonna go? Nope.


The Other Guys (2010)Quotes

27 if you were in the wild
28.
Just because you see a black man drivin' in a nice car, does not mean it's stolen…I stole that one. But not because I'm black!

Men in Black 3 (2012)Quotes

28 Men in Black 3 (2012)

Agent J: Look man, I have my rights, and I demand to see a lawyer before you press the red button on that device!
[the cops neuralyze themselves]
Agent J: That was a standard grade neuralyzer, but you're not going to remember that. Keep in mind, just because you see a black man driving a car, does not mean he stole it!

[pause]
Agent J: OK, I did steal this one – but not because I'm black.

 

29.

Why don't you go fuck yourself, you weird little prick.


pineapple express  2008

29 Pineapple Express (2008)


30.

and whatever your have to take the risk wether you fucking your cousin or not.


The Wolf of Wall Street : Quotes

30 and whatever your have to take the risk wether you fucking your cousin or not
31.

No cell phones.
What about now?


The Heat(2013)

31 The Heat(2013)

32.

To the window,to the window,To the walls,to the walls.To the sweat drip down my balls.Now all you bitches crawl.

The Proposal quotes

32 The Proposal
33.
Let's go handsome, come on.

Not you, fat Jesus.

the hangover quotes

33 Let's go handsome, come on
34.

Have you ever been French-kissed?
Are you kidding? I don't want to get pregnant.

Now and Then (1995) Quotes


Teeny: Chrissy, truth or dare?
Chrissy: Truth.
Teeny: Have you ever been french kissed?
Chrissy: Are you kidding? I don't want to get pregnant!

34 I don't want to get pregnant

 

35.

Congratulations,you're stupid in three languages.


Role Models (2008)

35 Role Models(2008)

36.

My mom says I'm special on the inside.

john trucker must die

36 My mom says I'm special on the inside

37.

It's so weird 'cause I feel totally calm.

AAAH! IT feels like i'm shitting a knife!


Baby Mama (2008)

37 Baby Mama (2008)

38.

I know it may look like I'd become a bitch, but that was only because I was acting like a bitch.


mean girls quotes

38 I know it may look like I'd become a bitch